Tuesday, 28 July 2009

I didn't mention Jamie Oliver's because I simply don't like him, sorry.

So, I've decided to keep the beard for a while longer. Did I mention I've been growing a beard? I've been growing a beard.

There are plenty of positives to having some face-fur. First, there's the warmth factor. Tired of having to tie a scarf around your neck on a cold day? No more! Just grow a beard!

It can make you look thinner too, a beard. And, if you want to look clever, all you have to do is stare in to the middle distance and stroke your chin. Believe me, it just screams intelligence. There's something about having hair on your face that makes that look alright. Doing it without a beard just looks...well, like you're stroking your face in public.

So, why don't I wear this naturally growing, warmth-inducing, I.Q.-increasing, weight loss miracle all the time? Well, its ginger. Really ginger.

This shouldn't be a problem in these more liberal times. But, while people have become more politically correct when it comes to race, age and sex, I'm afraid gingerism is still alive and well in this country. That's put me off growing a full beard in the past. But I now realise that by shaving it off I'm merely kowtowing to these follicle fascists.
So, I'm going to follow the examples set by the likes of Freddie Flintoff, Chuck Norris, Billy Gibbons of ZZ Top, and the entire male population of Scotland, and embrace the ginger beard. At least until I can afford a new razor.

PS During my research in to this phenomenon, and it is a phenomenon, I stumbled across this website, which celebrates the ginger beard in all its glory. There's a 'Beard Trumps' section, where you can submit a photo and have your beard turned in to a Top Trump card, and a section where you can send in photos of your ginger beard with a celebrity. I might send in this photo of my beard with Mary Wilson of The Supremes I've been promising you.


The gingerists will hate this.

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